Only For Now
by boo-bop
Summary: what if the roles were reversed? What if Katniss had a crush on Peeta and peeta had the bestfriend who was in love with him.
1. Chapter 1

_Give me just a second and I'll be all right.  
Surely one more moment couldn't break my heart. Give me 'til tomorrow then I'll be okay. Just another day and then I'll hold you tight, when your love is pouring like the rain  
I close my eyes and its gone again. When will I get the chance to say I love you.  
I pretend that you're already mine, and my heart ain't breaking every time, I look into your eyes_  
~ Daniel Bedingfield, Gotta Get Through This

I look over my shoulder just barely catching a glimpse of him, Peeta Mellark, the boy who saved me when my family was starving; he even risked a beating to help me. Ever since that day I couldn't help but notice him,

I walk to my spot in the square and see him talking to Jewels Smith, she's his best friend, or girlfriend, I really don't know but they're always together. I can't bare to watch them so I look over behind me and meet Gale's eyes. We wait patiently while the mayor goes over the history of Panem which I've heard so many times I could go up there and recite it myself. Finally Effie Trinket gets up there ad starts with a happy "Ladies first."  
She digs around in the big glass ball and finally comes out with a name: Primrose Everdeen.

Before I can register my thought I look out and see I'm standing in front of all of District 12 and of Panem, I know what I'm doing up there. I just volunteered to take Prims place, and I can feel the tears about to prickle in my eyes but quickly keep face and shake it off. After my display and a silent goodbye from everyone in District 12 she says the boys name, Peeta Mellark. The odds are not in my favour.


	2. Chapter 2: All The Right Moves

I know we've got it good  
But they've got it made  
And the grass is getting greener each day  
I know things are looking up, but soon they'll take us down  
Before anybody's knowing our name

They've got...

All the right friends in all the right places  
So yeah, we're going down  
They've got  
All the right moves in all the right faces  
So yeah, we're going down  
~ One Republic, All The Right Moves

I run over to the window to see the shiny Capitol, I feel warmth radiate from where Peeta is beside me. I see people cheering and waving for us to see them, then I glance over at Peeta who seems to be milking it. _What is he doing?_

"Who knows, one of them may be rich."

Then it hits me. Peeta the boy I've always been in love with is plotting against me. Am I the only one who was thinking hat we could maybe work together? I probably was and it was stupid. This is the Hunger Games, it's not like we could form an alliance. I need to stop worrying about Peeta and start worrying about myself.

The train stops and the rest of the day goes by in a blur and dizziness. By the time the day Is over and I've met my stylist after his assistants plucked me like a wild turkey I have a head ache but I tough it out knowing that I have to make it through the rest of the day and that I can't appear weak. It's finally supper time and I have a glass of wine for the first time ever that's keeping me buy, but my head starts to fog up so I stop drinking and start on my water that was waiting there for me. I see a flash of red hair that seems oddly familiar and with me inhibited from the wine say very loudly, "OH! I know you." I'm trying to put a name on her face but get this feeling of guilt deep in the pit of my stomach.

"There's no way that you know an Avox Katniss." Effie scoffs at me.

"An Avox?" I ask not knowing what one is.

"Traitors of the Capitol." Haymitch says simply, but I do know her. I know that I know her and now I know where I know her from. Everyone is looking at me now expecting me to say where I know her from, but now I'm worried because I know that I cant say it out loud. I glance up and see Peeta watching me too, but then he snaps his fingers and says "Dolly Cartright. That's where you know her from." _He helped me._

"Yes! That's it! There's something about her hair." I say.

"And the eyes too." He says, and for that moment I'm glad he's here with me. At least until I remember I am going to have to kill him if I'm going to make it out to see Prim again.

"So, Dolly Cartright?" Peeta says obviously asking for an explanation.

I would tell him but our hotel is probably tapped so I don't say anything,

Peeta senses this and says, "Why don't we go on the roof, but the winds really loud up there." And I translate this to Nobody will hear us talking up there.

When we get up there I'm sort of nervous about telling him the story so I pick at a clump of weeds before I finally tell him the whole thing.

"How do you know we're allowed up here?" I ask him.

"Cinna took me up here." He says responding to my question.

I shiver because the wind is not only loud but it's also cold. Peeta takes off his jacket and wraps it around my shoulders and when he touches my shoulder I shiver again, but not because of the cold this time, but because of his touch.

Peeta walks me back up to my room and I watch him as he leaves to go back to his room which is pretty close to mine.

I look over and realise I forgot to give him back his jacket, but that's just something for tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3: My Junk

_In the midst of this nothing. This miss of a there's this wanting to see you go 's almost like lovin'. Sad as that not be cool, but it's so where I 's like I'm your lover or more like your ghost.I spend the day wondering what you do, where you go.I try and just kick it but what can I 've all got our junk, and my junk is us, winter walking after a 's chill in the wind but it's warm in your stop all snow line, may not be 've all got our junk, and my junk is you._

~ Spring Awakening Cast, My Junk .com/watch?v=5e-McEzO3oI

I wake up and smell breakfast, I could probably smell it if I was a mile away. I put on some clothes that are lying here waiting for me and start on my way downstairs, I'm distracted by all of the art and fancy stuff around me that I bump in to someone. Stunned, then embarrassed at realizing who I bumped in to I blush, "Uh, sorry, I was kind of distracted." I say to Peeta.

He nods his head and says, "Yeah, I was too. This place is so… fancy." You can feel the lingering spite in his voice as he says this, and I know how he feels. The train practically suffocated me with all of it's velvets and rich colours but here. It's completely different. It has more glam and glimmer, not the fancy stuff but the electronics and devices that are supposed to make your everyday life easier, for instance, there's a shower that does all the washing for you. No wonder the Capitol doesn't think anything of all the work we do and all the work they don't do. They have never done it before in they're lives, but even so we have the advantage but also the downfall. We learn how to do things by ourselves and become independent but we're also starving and everyone is just scraping by, and the Capitol could destroy us all in a second, they have all the equipment we provide them with. I feel Peeta rustle around beside me, every time he brushes my arm it tingles. I can feel me getting even more nervous every minute. I try and make my way along as normally as I can until we make it over to where the breakfast is set up. There are heaps of food piling the plates looking as if they could fall of any second. I can feel my mouth starting to water as I look at all this food. I look over at Peeta and his eyes grew about 2 times the size. When I start to eat Effie start to make comments about how the tributes last year were like a bunch of savages and used their hands to eat, and it makes me really mad, because the tributes last year have never had a complete meal in their entire life and it was one of their last. I can't believe how horribly she's talking about them I make a point of using my hands to eat the rest of my meal It makes Effie purse her lips, which gives me the small sense of accomplishment until I realise that Peeta's watching me too. He's watching me act like a "barbarian" I feel embarrassed and don't want to look at him but I take a quick glance anyways. He doesn't look disgusted, more like amused which I don't know is worse or better so I push it out of my mind and force the thought that I might have to kill him in order to get home so I have to stop crushing on him, but obviously that resolution completely ends when the interviews start.


	4. Chapter 4: She's Got You High

_She's got you high and you don't even know yetShe's got you high and you don't even know yetIt's the search for the time before it leaves without youHave you lost your mind or has she taken all of yours too?_

- She's Got You High, Mumm-ra

:::

Peeta's POV

I have no idea what I'm doing. It's not like I have any romantic feelings for Katniss Everdeen, so why do I have this urge to keep her alive. Not to mention that I still have Jewel to worry about at home, thinking of her makes me remember the promise we made back in District 12:

"_Peeta!" Jewel shouts as she enter the velvet room to say good bye, maybe forever. Tears start pouring down her face when she wraps her arms around me tightly. "I love you. I love you so much, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me! I can't let you go, not without you knowing this."_

_This should shock me more than it does, but all I say is, "I know." I cringe immediately, it must sound so selfish. It sounds like even without her saying it, I knew she had no choice but to be romantically attracted to me. She immediately looks up at me, a puzzled expression showing behind her tears._

"_I don't mean it like that!" I say, holding her out at arms length. "What I mean is that there's a chance it could be different, if I wasn't headed for my imminent death." There disaster averted._

"_Then… you're saying that things could be different between us, that is, if you make it home?" her eyes light up a little bit, but even so, the darkness of the day has my light completely drained._

"_Yeah, it could possibly be different." I'm confused by my own words. I don't really think that it could be different. I think of her as being my friend. It's hard to imagine her being more, but I try. I really, really do._

_:::::::: _

I made that promise to her, thinking that I could never come back home again. Is that why I'm trying to help Katniss win? Because I don't want to go back and face my confused feelings about Jewel? I don't know, it's probably just a sense of protectiveness I have over Katniss, ever since that day where I threw her the bread. I still don't even know why I did that. I'm overcome with conflicting emotions when I my name is called to do my interview.

For the first minute and a half Caesar and I go through an entertaining back and forth banter about the mysteries in the Capitol I can't seem to comprehend, for example, the showers. The people of the Capitol are eating it up, loving every second of it. Then Caesar brings up the unmentionable question. Do I have a special girl?

"Haha, well Caesar. It's complicated." I say, immediately regretting the words.

"I'm sure we all can handle it. It's probably not anything that can't be fixed with you winning, eh?" He says nudging my elbow as the crowd gives a deafening cheer.

"She came here with me." I blurt out, before anything in my head makes sense, before I can use my brain to think up a suitable answer to that. Because the answer I gave was in no way suitable. The crowd gasps, and Caesar, for once, looks lost for words.

"That's very unfortunate." He finally says. "I wish you all the best. May the odds be ever in your favour." He says it in a calm, almost sa- no, not almost sad. He definitely said it sadly. Who can blame him. I turned me and Katniss into star-crossed lovers, without even meaning too. I did something stupid, I know.

I make my way back to Katniss's side, she looks at me questionably, looking more confused than I am, if that's even possible.

"It'll give you an edge. Make you look more desirable." I say, then turn on my heel wanting to get out of this place. Forever, never to return.

:::::

I hope she doesn't hate me. She would have every right to, I humiliated her in front of the entire nation. The entire nation. Jewel was watching that. My head hurts at the thought of how much she must be hurting right now. Then I think of Katniss, how humiliated she must be. I need to apologize to her, that's the first thing I need to do. I know where she'll be.

"Katniss?" I say cautiously as I make my way closer to where she's sitting on the roof.

"Hey Peeta." She says, flat, no emotion, monotone.

"I'm sorry!" She looks surprised. "I really didn't mean to say that. I lost my head, I was confused, it was the first thing that popped in my head!" I'm just making myself sound selfish now.

"Whatever Peeta," she looks away, but it's not long before she looks back. "Why do you think you can just play around with my emotions like that? It's not pleasant hearing that you said you love me because you 'lost your head', think about it."

"I don't know what to say Katniss. I screwed up. I didn't mean to disregard you feelings. And now we're really going to have to play this angle, huh?"

"What? You plan on going through with this?" "Yeah, we can't drop it now. I will take full responsibility and do all the work towards this act, okay?"

She scowls.

"What?" I say, my voice half pleading.

Katniss stares at me intently, looking as if she's going over her options. Her options about me.

"I can help. With the star-crossed lovers pitch. It'll give the crowd something to root for. Just don't look for me in the arena, I don't want to have to kill you."


End file.
